Tuesday, December 2, 2014

Disturbing Events....

There has been a series of disturbing events that have happened to me recently. I know it's that time of year where I should be focused on things I'm grateful for, but I just can't help myself...... I must share them! So here I go-- My top 5 disturbing moments of the week--

Warning: Reader beware....some of these may be classified in the "TMI" category

1-  I've been having some issues so I went in to see my "girly" doctor. After an ultrasound it showed that my IUD was embedded into my uterus. Definitely not good so after an extremely painful procedure they removed it. I am deeply sorry if you've had any contact with me in the last week or so. I have been so emotionally crazy and all over the place (just ask my mom who got a call from me three days before Thanksgiving asking if it was ok to have it at her house instead of mine). Thinking back on last week makes me sick. It was rough. I was seriously disturbed......*shiver*...... Alrighty then, moving onto number two....

2- I was feeling like I had a bladder infection (probably somehow related to my psycho IUD business) and so yesterday I finally went in to an instacare to get it checked out. Turns out I do have one, but that is not the disturbing part........ As they were checking my blood pressure and my height and weight I saw something awful. Something horribly disturbing. My height. The little marker was pointing to 5 foot 5 and 1/2. I've been 5 foot 6 my whole life! (Ok well obviously not my "whole" life, but a lot of it). My dream height has always been 5 foot 7 and I've always been just one stupid inch short of my dream! I stopped the nurse and said, "Wait....is that right? Am I really five foot five and a half??? I've thought that I was five foot six for years!" She looked at me and pointed down and said, "Well honey, your five foot five and a half with your shoes on so actually your probably only five foot five." Dramatic slow motion--NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! I can't believe I am 5 foot 5! It's like I don't even know who I am anymore!!! Gah! 

3- Ok so there's nothing more disturbing then smelling something yucky and not knowing what or WHERE it is. I'm embarrassed to say that this was the case in our car. The back of the car has been really full because I've been buying Christmas presents and all of Kevin's hunting gear is still back there and we've got our stroller and pack n play in there.....so ya I smelled something and after searching our seats I knew it must be in the back. I started taking stuff out and the smell got worse and worse. When I saw what was causing it I screamed out another slow motion Nooooooooooo! Our food assignment for Thanksgiving was stuffing and a platter of celery sticks with cheese in the middle....(out of the two guess which one no one ate).... Gross. Our platter was sitting in there and all the cheese had oozed out and had gone everywhere. On top of that there was also leftover Fluff that my sister made still in there. This is what it looked like on Thanksgiving--
So you can only imagine what it looked like four days later.........

4- This one might not sound disturbing to you, but it really was for me. As you probably know, I've completely submerged myself into the world of Gilmore Girls and I just finished the sixth season. I've heard a lot of things from people about the seventh season not being very good and how it's a different writer so I must have been really worried about it because I had a horrible dream about the seventh season. The episode started out with Rory getting murdered and everyone's reaction to it all. It was awful! Then suddenly I was in the episode and I could see Rory! I was the only one who could see her and she had gone insane and was telling me what happened to her and thru her telling me about it I was there and could see it all and we kept reliving it over and over and over again! It was soooooo scary!!!! We couldn't escape and every time a new episode started we were stuck in that first one while everyone else moved on........It was awful! I swear I spent all night long stuck in that disturbing first episode. Thankfully the next day I was able to start the seventh season and I'm happy to report that Rory does not die in it :)

5- Ok if you are still reading here is the last one.... I was getting ready for church this Sunday and I noticed that my leggings had a little hole in them. So naturally, instead of changing my outfit, I got a black sharpie and colored a big black spot on my leg where the hole was so I could still wear them :) Everything was all fine and dandy until this morning..... I took a shower and while I was in there my eyes spotted the big black spot! My heart just about flew out of my chest and I almost lost control and fell. I tried to contort myself so I could see it better, but the water was spraying everywhere so I turned it off and jumped out.  Cancer. It must be cancer. What else could this be?!? I sat down and took a good look at it and was completely panicking and about to throw up when I touched it and the most amazing thing happened! It spread to my fingers! Like an instant flashback I saw myself with the sharpie and it all came back to me!!! Phew! Haha! It seriously was such a terrifying moment....seeing some huge black spot on my leg! I scrubbed and scrubbed but unfortunately it's still on there pretty good as you can see--

don't mind.... I'll definitely take that over some horrible and "disturbing" disease ;)

Wednesday, November 12, 2014

The Prank of all Pranks

For those of you who know me, you know I LOVE a good prank. Especially when I am the one pulling the prank. I used to be a complete amateur..... When Kevin and I were first married I would hide in a closet and wait for him to come home just so I could scare him. The second I heard him coming I would burst out giggling and ruin the whole thing. This happened too many times to count and he would open up the closet and say something along the lines of, "Really? Again?" Needless to say I wasn't very good at it. But slowly I improved. Once I wrote a fake note that was supposed to be from our landlord and taped it to our door. It said that he was selling the place and we needed to be out by the end of the week. I matched his handwriting perfectly! Kevin had actually fallen for it until he came in and took one look at me and then I burst out laughing...... I definitely needed a lot of work. On a side note my mom had actually dropped by earlier and saw the note and hurried home in a panic and started making calls to try to find us a place to live! Haha!!! What a good mom! :)

Years went by and slowly I have gotten better. I am notorious for all my April fools pranks--being pregnant, cutting my hair, being pregnant with twins, cutting my bangs, fake snake in the underwear drawer, moving to Denver to go to grad school, leaving a positive pregnancy test in Kevin's brothers bathroom.........the list goes on :) As time has passed I've started to feel kind of guilty for all the deceit and its made me wonder, "Is there anyway I could use these amazing skills that I've perfected so perfectly and use them for good?!?" Well it took me a while, but I'm proud to say that I have done just that. So here is my story. I like to call it The Prank of all Pranks!!!!!

We have been doing a lot of updates to our home and we decided that we really wanted to paint our kitchen cabinets white. Kevin has been slammed with work and grad school and he seemed really stressed whenever I would bring it up so when Kevin told me he was going hunting for the weekend I knew that this was my time to shine! I had to have every detail planned or I knew I would mess this up so I sat down and devised my plan. 

My first step would be to get some help because there is no way I could pull this off on my own. My awesome sister in laws, Amanda and Kris, were on board to take Sam and Jane Friday night to late Saturday afternoon. Our wonderful close friends, Rob and Lauren Smith, would be there that entire time to help me paint. I even had more friends on call to come help (thanks Jen!) I could not have done it without you guys so thank you!!! Step one- check! Step two would be to get all the materials I'd need. Kevin checks our bank account daily so how could I buy all this stuff from Sherwin Williams and not have him know what I was up to??? Cash? No......he would see that and wonder why I took out two hundred bucks in cash. Credit card? No..... I'm too scared to use a credit card. A check? Yes! It was perfect. That would buy me some time because it takes a while for checks to clear. Ok so I bought all the supplies and they were very nice to me there. I think they thought I was a little crazy because I was SO excited and told everyone in the entire store my plan. Hehe! Everything so far was going smoothly. 

The next day Sam's bike broke and so we went to go buy him another one. When we pulled up to Walmart my heart stopped. All the paint and supplies was still in the trunk. We would have to put the bike in the trunk. He would see it all and figure it all out. Nooooooooo! So I tried to stay cool and said, "Hmmmm maybe we should go home and get our bigger car because the bike won't fit in the trunk.....there's lots of stuff in there....."  Kevin dismissed me and we walked inside. I seriously debated grabbing his keys and taking off, but knew that would be way too suspicious. Maybe I could say that I had to go to the bathroom and run out and hide all the stuff in a bush somewhere and come back for it later? Too risky.....Someone could steal it and then they'd have the beautiful white kitchen and not us! No, I had to play it cool and stay calm. We found the bike and fortunatlry it was smaller then I thought so it could easily fit on my lap in the car.... Phew! We walked out to our car and Kevin went straight for the trunk. I panicked so what did I do? I slapped his hand away really hard and grabbed the bike from him and said, "I'll just hold it on my lap.....all those heat filters are in there and there's just not enough room so I'll hold it. It's fine. I'll hold it. It's fine. It's fine. I'll hold it." 

Kevin looked at me like I was crazy. We both got in and he said, "This is obviously very important to you so I'm not going to say anything right now." I knew he knew I was hiding something so the second we pulled into our house I made him take Sam on a bike ride to break in his new bike (never mind that it was pitch black outside). When they were riding away I heard Kevin ask Sam if he wanted to go show Rob his new bike. Shoot!!!!! Rob and Lauren know everything! He could trick them into telling him things! The second they were out of sight I threw open the trunk and hid all the paint and then rushed in to call Lauren and warn her that Kevin was on his way and that he might ask her if I was hiding something or planning anything. Thankfully she answered and she played it cool ;) 

I was still worried that Kevin knew something was up so I decided I better cover my tracks. The next day I bought him some Dr. Pepper's and his favorite crackers and put them in the trunk. He was about to take off to go hunting and I had prepped Sam to tell him that we had a surprise for him..... I opened the trunk and bam! Now he thought that I was acting weird because I was hiding some cheezits and DP! Mwahahahaha!!!!! Everything was back on track! 

He left and stage three of the plan was in full force! I dropped off the kids and got to work! I worked from 2:30 that day till 12:30 in the morning and then from 7:00 AM till 3:30 that day. It was hard work, but we just about pulled it off....... My dad was the one hunting with Kevin and he was in on everything that was going on. It was his job to stall and keep them there as long as possible. My dad and Kevin are a lot alike and aren't very talkative people so they pretty much ran out of things to say that first day ;) My dad did his best but by 1:00 Saturday he couldn't take it anymore and decided to call it. My mom called me in a panic to tell me they were on their way! There was no way we could put all the doors back on in time because they were still drying so my dream of having it all completely done was dead..... BUT we had everything just about painted so it was a pretty close second :)

 Kevin pulled in and the look on his face was priceless. He did NOT look happy. He saw us in the garage with all the doors and thought we had just started. He was exhausted and thought, "Great, looks like this is what I'll be doing for the rest of the weekend." He got out and the closer he got the happier his face got :) I'll never forget the look on his face when he walked inside and saw it all painted......our beautiful white kitchen! He was thrilled! He really was speechless! I've never seen him like that before. It was so fun telling him everything that had happened and finally having the satisfaction of fooling him!!! He really never suspected a thing! This was definitely by far the most exciting and rewarding "prank" I've ever done. I can't wait until my next big idea hits me ;) Until then I guess I'll stick to my usual pranks....... Oh and on an unrelated note we are so excited to announce that baby number three is on its way!!!!!! 

Seriously did I get you??? :)

Here are some fun pics that I took so you can see all that this entailed...

I took off all the doors by myself! 

Rob working his mad taping skills ;)

Lauren dominated those doors!

All primed and ready to be painted.....

There were 42 doors to be painted...

Starting to come together!

Finally put all the doors on a few nights later!

Love it! Oh and do you recognize those handles?!? I blogged about them...they looked great with the white so we were able to use them! Who would've thought?!? 

Now we desperately need new countertops and a nice shade of grey to paint the walls....just one shade....not fifty :)

Pretty good job I do say so myself ;) 

Friday, October 3, 2014


Change. Change is scary. I don't like change. No matter how small or how big, I've always had a hard time with change. I don't even like typing the word change.....*shudder*..... I feel like life is all normal, predictable, and safe and then suddenly in just a blink of an eye everything is different! In a span of just one week so much has happened and there has been SO much change! Considering the circumstances, I am surprised at how well I am coping with everything ;) So what's been going on you might ask? Well, let me tell you :)

First off we no longer have a three year old...... Sam is FOUR!!! Woot woot! Sam's birthday was on Monday and he really wanted a "big boy bed" for his bday. We figured that meant a regular twin bed, but after showing him a bunch of pictures and him bursting into tears we realized that his idea of a "big boy bed" was in fact a bunk bed. So since Sam has me wrapped around his finger OF COURSE we bought him a bunk bed! He is in love and it's been really fun to see him so excited to go to bed at night! 

Speaking of Sam's birthday I mentioned on fb that he wanted a Daniel tiger cake and my amazing friend Lauren made one just for him. Here is how it turned out.....
Cute huh?!? He loves it so much!!!! He has been nursing it all week and since I am talking about change right now, here is what it looks like today......(Lauren you may want to close your eyes).....
Hehe! At least he's enjoying every bite :) Here is Jane enjoying her cake.......
Can't believe this boy is four!!! So far he is loving it..... Got to wear this crown all day at school and now instead of three pickles he gets four at lunch..... Every morning when he wakes up he asks me, "Is Sammy still four?" Haha!!!

We decided to have a little change of scenery and so we went up to Kevin's cabin for the weekend and we had a blast! My parents and Kevin's parents came and we had fun eating, laughing, napping, gaming, boating, fishing, chatting, crying, giggling, and snacking. Good times :)

Another big change has been our house. We are finally getting stuff done around here and it's so fun! We've been here almost a year and a half now and we finally hung our first picture! We're so grown up ;) We also put our playroom together so that's been a life saver :)

Another big change happened yesterday. This is something I've been talking about doing for YEARS. It's a really big deal for me........I cut my hair!!! Kevin flew to California for the day for work and so for some reason that morning I thought, "I want to cut my hair today." Usually when I want to cut my hair I talk and think about it for months and months and then I end up taking like two inches off. I'm not sure why, but this time was different. I called my hair lady to see when her soonest appointment would be and she had just had a cancelation and she could see me that day! It was fate!!!! I got a sitter with ease and I was on my way! I told her what I wanted and she seemed so excited about it so that made me feel so great! Then she asked if I wanted to donate to Locks of Love and of course I said yes! I didn't think I had enough hair to donate, but sure enough she put it in a braid and chopped it off! I posted a pic on fb and I seriously LOVE that so many of you thought it was a prank and demanded more proof!!! I was laughing all night :) So for those of you who still aren't convinced--here is your proof :)

And here is one in a pony tale..... I love how short and tiny it is! Eeeeehehe!

I haven't had hair this short since I was Sam's age! Usually I cut my hair and I'm filled with regret, but this time I'm still liking it and haven't burst into tears yet! Kevin is amazed! Lol ;) Oh and to finish my story-- He got home from California around midnight that night and I was too excited to go to sleep so I waited up for him and he was so surprised!!! The first thing he said to me was how proud of me he was because he knew what a big deal this was for me......so sweet! He loves it and thinks this should be the "new boo" for a long time :)

Let's see.....what else has changed???  Hmmmmm........well we are about to paint our kitchen cabinets white so that will be a huge change so I'll keep you posted on that........ Hmmm what else??? OH!!!! Now I remember! Turns out that when Jane gets wet she changes into a mermaid! Think I'm joking and this is another prank?!? Well then here's your proof........

Bath and then..........
Poof! Mermaid!!!! See?!? Crazy change going on around here :)

So there you have it! Lots has happened, but thankfully it's all good things :) I'm excited to spend the day in my Jammie's and listen to Conference....... Happy conference weekend everybody and cheers to CHANGE!!!!!!!!! Oh wow...I didn't shudder typing it that time! I'm evolving and.........CHANGING!!!........ ;)